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Americans prefer houses with basements. In fact, they're bes..

Americans prefer houses with basements. In fact, they're best cellars!

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It was a terrible summer for Humpty Dumpty... but he had a g..

It was a terrible summer for Humpty Dumpty... but he had a great fall.

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I put up a high-voltage electric fence around my property ov..

I put up a high-voltage electric fence around my property over the weekend, my neighbour is dead against it...

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How do you organize a space party? You planet!

How do you organize a space party? You planet!

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For a fungi to grow you must give it as mushroom as possible..

For a fungi to grow you must give it as mushroom as possible.

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I hate carrying my luggage around the airport, I rest my cas..

I hate carrying my luggage around the airport, I rest my case.

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Today a man knocked on my door and asked for a small donatio..

Today a man knocked on my door and asked for a small donation towards the local swimming pool, so I gave him a glass of water.

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Stop with the blind jokes...I dont see the point.

Stop with the blind jokes...I dont see the point.

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If a judge loves the sound of his own voice, expect a long s..

If a judge loves the sound of his own voice, expect a long sentence.

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Weight loss pills stolen this morning - police say suspects ..

Weight loss pills stolen this morning - police say suspects are still at large.

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Why wouldn’t anyone want to buy a car made by Apple? It woul..

Why wouldn’t anyone want to buy a car made by Apple? It wouldn’t have Windows.

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I called my dogs Rolex and Timex. They’re watch dogs.

I called my dogs Rolex and Timex. They’re watch dogs.

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Geology rocks, but Geography is where it’s at.

Geology rocks, but Geography is where it’s at.

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My friend Jack can talk to vegetables. Jack and the beans ta..

My friend Jack can talk to vegetables. Jack and the beans talk. 

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Went to the bar tonight. Good times. Only a 15-minute walk. ..

Went to the bar tonight. Good times. Only a 15-minute walk. But the walk home took 45 minutes, the difference was staggering.

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Jokes about German sausage are the wurst.

Jokes about German sausage are the wurst.

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I recently took a pole. And found that 100% of the people in..

I recently took a pole. And found that 100% of the people in the tent were angry when it collapsed.

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Why did the man fall down the well? He couldn’t see that wel..

Why did the man fall down the well? He couldn’t see that well.

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What do you call a short mother? A minimum.

What do you call a short mother? A minimum.

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Why does Daniel Craig have greying hair in the latest Bond f..

Why does Daniel Craig have greying hair in the latest Bond film? He has No Time to Dye.

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I’m writing a theatre piece about puns. It’s a play on words..

I’m writing a theatre piece about puns. It’s a play on words.

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Did you hear the joke about paper? Never mind, it’s tear-abl..

Did you hear the joke about paper? Never mind, it’s tear-able.

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What’s orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot.

What’s orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot.

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How do you talk to giants?Use big words!

How do you talk to giants?
Use big words!

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